i'm a week into blogging everyday and i've only missed twice that i can tell. considering i'm used to blogging once or twice a month that's not bad at all. i totally forgot last night as i was busy making hot wings, drinking wine and playing glee karaoke volume 1. let me just say, no one does glee like me! i'm a gleek for sure. but also a badass drunk karaoke singer!
i'm sure my neighbors hated my loud, drunken cooing but i had a blast. it was the perfect way to veg out after a long week. this morning i woke up with a slight headache but nothing a little water can't handle. now to decide what to do with my day. last weekend i stayed in and did laundry. it was pretty relaxing. this weekend i want to also be lowkey but a little less solo.
i have been having a hard time lately with some things not working out the way i wanted or expected so i am trying to regain perspective and move forward. i am usually really good at that but for some reason it's not all coming together a fast as it used to. it's a minor setback. but i'll work it out. don't you worry your little heads! think i'll break out glee karaoke again for a little inspiration.
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Friday, March 25, 2011
no rest for the weary
tonight i hung out with my girl and i had a great time. we went to a birthday party for one of her friends and i got to reconnect with some friends i hadn't seen in a while. i love reconnecting. and i hope to do better staying in touch with people. after the party we went to a konami game party at the experiencing music project and enjoyed free drinks, snacks and konami's new titles. i had a blast but most of all i won volume 1 of glee karaoke revolution! that's right suckas, i'm about to get my gleek on up in here!
to cap off the night my friend and i had a great conversation about acknowledging your worth/skills on the job and working to be in a place where you get to shine as well as grow. right now i'm unhappy with my job situation. i've been there almost three years and it just keeps getting NOT better. there have been some developments recently that could bring change but everything i've seen in the past shows the opposite. i feel stifled and underutilized in the worst way. it's time for change and i realized tonight that i need to get serious about bringing that change to fruition.
i used to be married to a life plan. i've learned to ease up a bit in that area. now i realize that i don't have control but i like living with a roadmap. i'm going to spend the next few weeks mapping out the course i want my career to go and start working to make it happen. i'm responsible for my own life. i am where i am because of the choices i've made. time to make different choices so i can see different outcomes. and i have to do all of this while continuing the plan to move toward marriage. i tell you, a real woman's work is never done!
to cap off the night my friend and i had a great conversation about acknowledging your worth/skills on the job and working to be in a place where you get to shine as well as grow. right now i'm unhappy with my job situation. i've been there almost three years and it just keeps getting NOT better. there have been some developments recently that could bring change but everything i've seen in the past shows the opposite. i feel stifled and underutilized in the worst way. it's time for change and i realized tonight that i need to get serious about bringing that change to fruition.
i used to be married to a life plan. i've learned to ease up a bit in that area. now i realize that i don't have control but i like living with a roadmap. i'm going to spend the next few weeks mapping out the course i want my career to go and start working to make it happen. i'm responsible for my own life. i am where i am because of the choices i've made. time to make different choices so i can see different outcomes. and i have to do all of this while continuing the plan to move toward marriage. i tell you, a real woman's work is never done!
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
make new friends ....
when you relocate as an adult you are faced with the task of recreating a network in your new location. it's not easy. the older you get the harder it is to make friends. i moved to seattle with only one friend living here. i used my online skills to create a network through linkedin of other alumni in the area. it proved to be successful as i met a really dear friend that way. but mostly, it's been trial and error. and trust me, there was an error.
it wasn't totally their fault as they didn't know me and had no idea the high value and standards i place on friendship. the closer we got the more i realized we weren't on the same page. no harm no fowl. we parted ways and moved on with our lives. i met new people and developed a new circle. it has been God send because at the end of the day, when the stuff hits the fan, i believe there are at least a few ladies who would have my back. and that's really all any of us can ask for.
the thing is that friendship has growing pains and my new friends don't know me the way my old friends do. they don't get my humor all the time, or understand my facial expressions or gestures when words can't find their way to my lips. sometimes we don't communicate well and words are misunderstood and feelings get hurt. it can be exhausting when you're used to people just getting you. but then you have to remember that you went through the same thing with your old friends and it took some time for you to settle into the comfortable familiarity that warms your heart and puts a smile on your face just thinking about them.
i'm glad i met the ladies and gentlemen who have entered my life at this juncture but it would be nice to feel like they actually get me. many times i feel like i'm lost on them. i get blank stares or shrugged shoulders or in some instances dismissed. as a sensitive person it sucks. but i know we all have a tendency to be self-absorbed and we have to accept it as a fact of life. i will just be glad when this space in time passes.
it wasn't totally their fault as they didn't know me and had no idea the high value and standards i place on friendship. the closer we got the more i realized we weren't on the same page. no harm no fowl. we parted ways and moved on with our lives. i met new people and developed a new circle. it has been God send because at the end of the day, when the stuff hits the fan, i believe there are at least a few ladies who would have my back. and that's really all any of us can ask for.
the thing is that friendship has growing pains and my new friends don't know me the way my old friends do. they don't get my humor all the time, or understand my facial expressions or gestures when words can't find their way to my lips. sometimes we don't communicate well and words are misunderstood and feelings get hurt. it can be exhausting when you're used to people just getting you. but then you have to remember that you went through the same thing with your old friends and it took some time for you to settle into the comfortable familiarity that warms your heart and puts a smile on your face just thinking about them.
i'm glad i met the ladies and gentlemen who have entered my life at this juncture but it would be nice to feel like they actually get me. many times i feel like i'm lost on them. i get blank stares or shrugged shoulders or in some instances dismissed. as a sensitive person it sucks. but i know we all have a tendency to be self-absorbed and we have to accept it as a fact of life. i will just be glad when this space in time passes.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
getting out of the house
since i've decided to kick sallie mae out my house by paying my student loans off in the next five years, i've had to get some mental adjustments down. for starters, my normal mode of entertainment will have to change. i love movies and i usually go every friday night as long as there is anything worth seeing. that isn't always the case. but usually i find something to enjoy.
but since i'm saving money and cutting back on things, i have to change how i entertain myself. right now, i'm sitting in the commons area of a large book store typing away on my laptop and watching last night's episode of pretty little liars ( a serious guilty pleasure of mine!) and thinking of new ways to entertain myself without spending massive amounts of money. so far on my list is hanging out at bookstores to get my people fix as opposed to eating out. i also plan to have friends over for "potlucks" more often so i can still hang out with them and have fun without spending money. i think you get the picture. i'm trying not to spend money i don't need to spend. the more money i can throw at sallie mae the sooner i can give her the boot!
but since i'm saving money and cutting back on things, i have to change how i entertain myself. right now, i'm sitting in the commons area of a large book store typing away on my laptop and watching last night's episode of pretty little liars ( a serious guilty pleasure of mine!) and thinking of new ways to entertain myself without spending massive amounts of money. so far on my list is hanging out at bookstores to get my people fix as opposed to eating out. i also plan to have friends over for "potlucks" more often so i can still hang out with them and have fun without spending money. i think you get the picture. i'm trying not to spend money i don't need to spend. the more money i can throw at sallie mae the sooner i can give her the boot!
the opposite of funny
i missed my blogging date last night because i was busy skyping with my bestie about life and how the place we find ourselves today, at this very moment (last night of course) was so not funny we couldn't help but laugh. in fact, i'd say somethings in our life are so not funny, they are the exact opposite of funny. and yet, after crying, screaming, and lamenting about it all, we found ourselves laughing!
so here's the thing, we are generally happy women who have pursued our educational and career goals without apology. we dance like no one is watching, laugh until our sides hurt, love deeply and completely enjoy life. hey, someone's gotta do it! but at the end of a hard day - a career woman has many of these by the way - it's a reality that we come home to empty houses. some days, that stings more than i'd like to admit.
i joke with my married friends with children that i'll be 40 going to kindergarten for the first time while they are dealing with teenagers. the thing is that at 32 (i know that's not old, yet) i'm no spring chicken. and since i'm not currently moving toward marriage with anyone, i could very easily be 3 years down the line giving birth. i won't entertain the thought of it being longer. mostly because i really will cry.
it's disheartening at this point. what decisions exactly have led me to this place in life? i'm not the type of career woman who decided to delay a family in favor of career advancement. in fact, i've been more than open to love. it just hasn't found me yet. so in the meantime, i was about the business of living my life. and i live! i travel, i watch and play sports, i enjoy music, i volunteer, i mentor and i socialize on the regular. and when i need downtime, i'm not sure anyone does it better than me!
so, what's a girl to do when she finds herself in a place where most things in her life are going just fine but a few key areas seem distant and out of reach? she laughs to overcome the pain and disappointment. because it's not funny, it's the opposite of funny.
so here's the thing, we are generally happy women who have pursued our educational and career goals without apology. we dance like no one is watching, laugh until our sides hurt, love deeply and completely enjoy life. hey, someone's gotta do it! but at the end of a hard day - a career woman has many of these by the way - it's a reality that we come home to empty houses. some days, that stings more than i'd like to admit.
i joke with my married friends with children that i'll be 40 going to kindergarten for the first time while they are dealing with teenagers. the thing is that at 32 (i know that's not old, yet) i'm no spring chicken. and since i'm not currently moving toward marriage with anyone, i could very easily be 3 years down the line giving birth. i won't entertain the thought of it being longer. mostly because i really will cry.
it's disheartening at this point. what decisions exactly have led me to this place in life? i'm not the type of career woman who decided to delay a family in favor of career advancement. in fact, i've been more than open to love. it just hasn't found me yet. so in the meantime, i was about the business of living my life. and i live! i travel, i watch and play sports, i enjoy music, i volunteer, i mentor and i socialize on the regular. and when i need downtime, i'm not sure anyone does it better than me!
so, what's a girl to do when she finds herself in a place where most things in her life are going just fine but a few key areas seem distant and out of reach? she laughs to overcome the pain and disappointment. because it's not funny, it's the opposite of funny.
Sunday, March 20, 2011
writers are supposed to write.
i've been feeling guilty about how infrequently i blog because the whole point is to blog regularly. i've never committed to blogging every day but i'm thinking maybe i should. i'm a writer by training. i have both bachelor and master's degrees in journalism. i don't work in the field, per se, but i work in web communications. either way, i'm a writer and writers are supposed to write.
so i want to try to challenge myself to blog everyday. this blog usually includes the most intimate details of my emotional state as i blog about love and things. but i'm sure i could find other things to talk about as there is no shortage of awesome and not so awesome going on in my life at any given moment.
for instance, i'm searching for a new gig because i want more of a challenge. i've also cried more than once in the last few days because i'm single and i desire to be married and eventually moving toward having a family. there is no shortage of things for me to blog about so i'm going to see if i can do it. can i bore you with my life everyday for the rest of this year. i'm sure i can! lol.
so i want to try to challenge myself to blog everyday. this blog usually includes the most intimate details of my emotional state as i blog about love and things. but i'm sure i could find other things to talk about as there is no shortage of awesome and not so awesome going on in my life at any given moment.
for instance, i'm searching for a new gig because i want more of a challenge. i've also cried more than once in the last few days because i'm single and i desire to be married and eventually moving toward having a family. there is no shortage of things for me to blog about so i'm going to see if i can do it. can i bore you with my life everyday for the rest of this year. i'm sure i can! lol.
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
counting the cost
i recently made the decision to become completely debt free. i've always known that credit card debt and car debt were bad debts, but most accept student loan debt and house debt as par for the course. i pretty much accepted it too. but i was talking to my friend about tightening up my finances - no they aren't in shambles but we can always be better - and i got to thinking. why should i accept that debt is a way of life, even so-called good debt? especially when i could make the decision to live debt free?
my friend told me about his system and what he does to manage his money and i got inspired. so i signed up for the financial peace university so i can learn how to get cracking on kicking sallie mae out of my house and get in position to buy a house debt free or really close to it!
i'll start by saying facing debt is no easy task. it is hard work depending on the type and amount of debt you have. but it's not impossible. and when you've confronted it and dealt with it, the outcome is worth it. can you imagine what your life would be like without a car payment, house note or student loan? aw, it sounds like bliss to me! and so i began my journey. it's about taking baby steps and i'm just getting started but i'm excited about what my life will be like seven years from now. i've taken a few minutes to count the cost of my life and decided i don't want debt to have any place in it. to celebrate my success, i'm taking a trip around the world.
my friend told me about his system and what he does to manage his money and i got inspired. so i signed up for the financial peace university so i can learn how to get cracking on kicking sallie mae out of my house and get in position to buy a house debt free or really close to it!
i'll start by saying facing debt is no easy task. it is hard work depending on the type and amount of debt you have. but it's not impossible. and when you've confronted it and dealt with it, the outcome is worth it. can you imagine what your life would be like without a car payment, house note or student loan? aw, it sounds like bliss to me! and so i began my journey. it's about taking baby steps and i'm just getting started but i'm excited about what my life will be like seven years from now. i've taken a few minutes to count the cost of my life and decided i don't want debt to have any place in it. to celebrate my success, i'm taking a trip around the world.
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